E-Jail

Today, I’ll continue with my tirade against technology, and all the agony it often brings. No discussion of technological advances would be complete without discussing the proliferation of Electronic Mail (e-mail or email for short).

Decades after computers became commercially available, and moments after computer-to-computer communication became possible, electronic mail was introduced to the masses. The prospect of being able to send a letter to an acquaintance that lives hundreds of miles away, with only a few keystrokes, was simply remarkable. Not only would one save time, but they’d also save money (stamps and envelopes), pencils and pens, and paper too. Plus, the stress of finding time to get to the Post Office would be alleviated. You could reach a whole world with just a few pushes of buttons, and have your thoughts conveyed to a wide range of people.

Unfortunately, all those advantages have been manipulated and perverted (seemingly in an attempt to frustrate me specifically) and there seems to be no end to the madness.

I recall entering college only a short few years ago. At that time virtually everyone was aware of email and most probably had email accounts at home, though I know not everyone did. I remember that on campus, you could go two or three days at a time without reading your email and be just fine. In fact, Instructors rarely sent valuable information over email because not everyone had become completely acclimated to the idea of checking their email daily. By the end of my freshman year, that had changed significantly. You were expected to read your email everyday because in-class and out-of-class assignments were being given over email in high frequency.

And that’s when the storm came!

The first major “mail storm” that I’d witnessed occurred about March or April towards the end of my freshman year. I received a sickening amount of email from one source, with one message. I didn’t know why this was, or how it happened, however, I did not foresee this occurrence becoming a common thing. Much to my dismay, the mail storms never stopped.

Mail Storms were soon accompanied by their cousin, Spam.

Spam was no longer just Luncheon Meat that could sit in a cabinet unharmed despite being bombarded by nuclear weapons. Spam was now an entity brought about by intrusive people who had nothing better to do with their time than to waste mine.

Mortgages, weight loss plans, pornography, messages that didn’t even make sense, all these things started coming to me through email, and I really wondered why. I’d never signed up for anything and I didn’t know these people that were sending me this stuff. Plus, this wasn’t like my email account at home where I expected such things; this was my University given, student email account. How could this be?

The sad thing was that there was seemingly little I could do about it.

By the beginning of my fourth year, I’d become completely fed up with the email situation on campus and sought to do something about it. I wrote up a proposal concerning what the problem was, the affects of the problem, and how I felt it could be rectified. I don’t even remember whom I sent the proposal to, but I somehow found myself before one of the University Provost. We discussed my proposal for about a half hour, and I was placed on the Student Advisory board for Information Technology. It was through this discussion, and the IT board meetings, that I discovered that there was virtually nothing I could do to end Spam or Mail Storms. The only thing that I could do was to write a letter to Legislatures in order to compel them to create a Bill that would outlaw such misuse of email. Furthermore, even if there was a Law against it here in the United States, email is a worldwide thing, and there would have to be International sanctions on it in order to end such email irritation. Needless to say, I was mad as a six-shooter, and frustrated as a Squirrel that can’t find a nut.

The situation yet continues to escalate. It seems that no matter how many email accounts I open, the “spammers” eventually find me. All of my email accounts are bombarded with junk mail daily. Honestly, there is no end in sight.

What I’ve mentioned here is only part of my frustration with email. I haven’t even mentioned how informal email is (which may indeed be one of its advantages as well as disadvantages). People are beginning to use email as a substitute for letters, even for significant events such as Weddings. When someone only emails you (especially if you haven’t talked over the phone, in person, or through Post Office mail in a while), you get the sense that they don’t value your relationship as much as if they’d use other modes of communication. To receive an email invitation to a significant event like a Wedding is like a very rude slap in the face from someone that you considered a good friend. I'm imagining, however, this practice will someday become commonplace and maybe we'll overlook it. But as for me, at least give me a phone call.

I also haven’t mentioned how frustrating it is to have to filter out your email box, even if you aren’t receiving spam, from forwards that friends/family send you (aye, sometimes even the ones you love get carried away). You struggle to find that 1 out of 37 emails that is sent to you and only you (you know, that really important one you’ve been waiting to receive. Well, it’s probably buried in a pile of junk).

I think email is the King of examples of how something that could be extremely convenient and helpful can be turned into something that is deplorable and corrupt. As you’re sitting there reading this right now, I know you’re feeling me!

-Maelstrom