The Uncomfortable "Bachelor" Reality

As anyone who’s read this blog knows, I have a guilty pleasure…I watch The Bachelor (and The Bachelorette).  Tonight marks the final episode of the current season which features Ben as the lucky guy who gets to choose between the final two ladies from a harem of roughly 30 women.  As the custom of the show is, the week that precedes the final episode of The Bachelor is the “Ladies Tell All” episode in which the “non-rosed” ladies who were eliminated during the season get to air all of their grievances with each other as well as with the (un)lucky gentleman.  But during this season’s “Tell All” episode, things got colorful…literally.

As I pointed out in a post last May, each season of the Bachelor(ette) I watch in part to see how many people of color get cast as one of the individuals vying to woo the Bachelor(ette).  And then, I watch as they are always eliminated in advance of one of the most important episodes: “The Hometown Visit.”  The Hometown episode is important for a number of reasons, not the least of which is that those who get that far likely have the best chance at being next season’s Bachelor or Bachelorette.  This is in part true because the TV audience has gotten a better chance to know them than some of the individuals eliminated in the 1^st few weeks.

This season of the Bachelor, there were three lovely Black women amongst the field of ladies contending for the heart of Ben.  One of these ladies, Jubilee, was particularly endearing because 1) she is a Veteran of the military, 2) she has a very powerful tale of overcoming serious tragedies in her life, 3) she’s got a lively personality and 4) she’s quite attractive.  Out of all the seasons of the show, it appeared that Jubilee had the best chance at being the 1^st Black person to be name THE Bachelorette, because Ben seemed to really be attracted to her, she lasted almost until “The Hometown” episode, and she’d gained quite a popular following in the social media landscape. Though I knew her chances were slim – I still very seriously doubt that there’ll be a Black bachelor or bachelorette any time soon – she had as good a shot as any of the other ladies on the show, and the best shot of all the Black contestants to date.

But that was before the airing of the “Ladies Tell All” episode.  During the show, it was revealed by Jamie and Amber (the two other Black ladies on the show who are both light-skinned and happen to be biracial) were personally offended by Jubilee proclaiming that she was “the full Black girl” on the show.  This comment came after Jamie jokingly commented that she was the token Canadian girl on the show.  Jubilee, who isn’t light-skinned or dark-skinned, but rather in-between (is there a term for that?) seemed oblivious to how insensitive and hurtful such a statement could be to someone who is Black, but also “mixed” with another racial background.  This led to a rather lengthy back-and-forth discussion that I’m sure the show’s producers were cringing through.    

And at that moment, I knew Jubilee’s chance (and thus the chance of any Black person) at being next season’s Bachelorette was over. 

You see, colorism is a deep issue amongst Black people.  It hearkens back to the days when there were light-skinned “house” slaves who lived in the Master’s house (because he was their father, quiet as kept), and dark-skinned “field” slaves who worked in the cotton fields.  The house slaves were often treated better than the field slaves, and some could even pass for white.  This was the cause of much tension amongst Black people. 

Fast forward to today, and “friendly fire” still exists amongst Black people (as exemplified by Jubilee).  Often darker skinned Black people are teased simply for being dark while light-skinned Black folks are chided for having straight hair.  It’s such a deep topic that it would take me several posts of great length to just begin to discuss.  And America isn’t ready for that discussion, no matter how deep or shallow.  Most probably don’t even realize it exists.

But there it was, on national TV, for all the world to see in its full ugliness.  Alas, Jubilee, there will be no Bachelorette season for you.

As much as Jubilee was totally out of line for ever saying something so ridiculous and hurtful as “I’m the full black girl” to two other Black women, she’s not the only one to blame for the airing of such dirty laundry.  I also blame the ABC network and The Bachelor franchise. 

If they’d had a greater diversity in whom they named the Bachelor or Bachelorette from the beginning, race in the context in which it was brought up last week would’ve never happened.  Everyone knows that the big elephant in the room as it pertains to casting the show is that no Black person has ever been named the Bachelor or Bachelorette, and none has ever made it to “The Hometown” episode.  Furthermore, all the people of color who’ve gotten those chances have all been fair or pale skinned, and could pass as caucasian (remember Juan Pablo?).  Apparently one of Jubilee’s misstatements to the other Black girls was that she was going to be the 1^st full black girl to get the farthest on the show; a motivation that wouldn’t be there if it were common for Black people (or darker-skinned folks of any origin) to truly have a chance at making it to the latter stages of the show (or to, god-forbid, be the star of the season).

As this season ends, the prospect of seeing a Black person as the Bachelor or Bachelorette remains the same as it always has been…just a fantasy!  It’s really a shame too, because Jubilee would’ve made a great Bachelorette!

-Maelstrom

Casting "The Bachelor"

I’m a regular viewer of The Bachelor and The Bachelorette on ABC (yes…it’s a guilty pleasure), which debuted with another Bachelorette season this week.  Despite the fact that I’m a devoted viewer of the show, there are many aspects of the show that I find objectionable.  For example, I think the ridiculous amounts of cash that must be spent on sending the participants to the most lavish hotspots on the planet is financially wasteful.  And to be sure, the consistent promiscuity of the bachelor/bachelorette that permeates each season is quite ironic considering that the premise of the show is the pursuit of falling in love with ONE of the contestants.  Oh, and did I mention that it’s beyond decadent that the lead protagonist begins swapping spit with multiple “prospects” almost the moment that they step out of the limo…and the spit swapping later leads to sex with “prospects” with whom the protagonist definitely does not care to wed at the end of the season (as we found out when Nick Viall outed Andi Dorfman for doing that to him during season 10 of The Bachelorette).

When you really think about it, the show is nothing more than “The Real World/Road Rules Challenge,” dressed up in sophistication. 

Now the objections I listed above are obvious.  But I think there’s something deeper in the pattern of the show that I find to be common in America, and that something is terribly damaging…

…for several seasons there has been a revolving carousel of contestants who later become either the Bachelor or the Bachelorette.  So if you are NOT one of the last four contestants standing the previous season, the chance of you becoming the Bachelor/Bachelorette is slim to none.  Since the lead contestants are chosen from the previous season’s contestants, and the show began with a VERY homogenous crowd of participants (i.e. white/Caucasian American), the cast (as well as the chosen Bachelor/Bachelorette) is incredibly lacking in diversity. 

How does this relate to America at large you ask?  Well for centuries, Black people were not allowed to obtain public education, have certain jobs or participate in certain community activities due to institutions like slavery and the Jim Crow Laws of the South.  Now that slavery has been abolished and Jim Crow has been eradicated, and we’re “post-racial,” it would seem that Black people would be represented in numbers at least approaching their representation in the general population in jobs across the board, right?

Nope!!!

Here’s how it actually works…for centuries only white men could hold the majority of profitable jobs.  Because people tend to surround themselves with folks that look like them (or that they know), the majority of hires for the lucrative/powerful positions are white (and male).  There may be a sprinkling of people of color, but because those people of color typically don’t have the (often racially directed) insider network of their white counterparts, they tend not to get the references.  So the candidates who then get the job often come from the same network of white men they’re already closely associated with, and they themselves tend to be white.

The Bachelor franchise highlights this so glaringly.  Think about it, Sean Lowe, Chris Soules, Jake Pavelka and Jason Mesnick all became the Bachelor after appearing as contestants on The Bachelorette.  Ashley Hebert, Desiree Hartsock, as well as this season’s co-contestants Britt Nilsson and Kaitlyn Bristowe, all became the Bachelorette after appearing as contestants on The Bachelor. 

In fact, there have only been a few black, latino or asian contestants at all on either series.  And none have served as The Bachelor or The Bachelorette, with the exception of season 18’s Juan Pablo Galavis, who is white latino (i.e. most people wouldn’t guess that he’s latino without hearing him speak or knowing his name). 

If the franchise continues for another 10 or 20 seasons, I doubt there will ever be a Black Bachelorette (she’d certainly be deemed ghetto if she got into some of the fights or had the many trysts that previous White Bachelorette’s have had).  And there will definitely not be a Black Bachelor (there’s no way White America would approve of a Black man having sex with a cohort of their precious White daughters, even though it seems to be fine for White men to do on the show, and despite the fact that America's precious White daughters have sex with Black men while they’re away at college anyway).

Well, I suppose it (a Black man/woman as the Bachelor/Bachelorette) could happen.  But until then, I’ll continue having fun each season playing the game, “when will the last minority be voted off?” 

-Maelstrom

Am I Drunk or Am I Seeing Stars

In an epidemic that seems just outright silly yet amazing to me, the latest in a string of celebrities, athletes and politicians to be arrested for suspicion of DUI is Rebecca De Mornay. You might remember her as the hot temptress that played opposite Tom Cruise in his breakout film “Risky Business,” or as the evil babysitter in “The Hand That Rocks The Cradle.” I personally remember her for being the really sexy lady in “And God Created Woman,” but that’s neither here nor there.

In any case, I am just astounded that this list keeps getting longer. De Mornay now joins “24” star Kiefer Sutherland, young pop singer and actress Lindsay Lohan, Congressman Patrick Kennedy, NFL player Chris Henry, and a whole host of other rich, well-off, famous people who have been charged with driving under the influence.

There are too many angles with which to consider this topic, so I’ll just keep it simple.

What disturbs me most is that these people, above everyone else, have the ability to do what many others could only dream of; they could call not just a cab, but a limo and a chauffeur to drive them to and from an occasion where alcohol will be present. In fact, they could call and have the party come to their location so that they don’t even have to drive anywhere, thus avoiding the potential for DUI.

It further bothers me that these people are not only being personally foolish, but they are also being selfish and inconsiderate. It’s not enough that they are endangering their own lives, but they are also putting at jeopardy the lives of those traveling the roadways with them.

Finally, I guess that the loose laws that govern these cases are the other factor that trouble me. Time and time again a celebrity gets caught for DUI; maybe they have to go to court. And after receiving a warning from the judge, they go to this fairytale place called “rehab,” which obviously has nothing to do with rehabilitation. After they return from “la la land rehab” they’re free to wreak havoc on the roadways once again.

And unfortunately they often do just that…continue to endanger theirs and others lives by drinking and driving again.

Perhaps if athletic organizations had tougher, consistent policies about not drinking and driving, St. Louis Cardinals’ pitcher Josh Hancock would still be alive. Maybe if Hollywood Studios would write clauses into contracts that warned of substantial loss of money in the instance of DUI, stars like part-time actress Paris Hilton wouldn’t be prone to getting behind the wheel intoxicated. Maybe if our lawmakers would actually abide by the traffic laws they help pass, and suffered severe punishment for breaking them, it would set some form of a societal standard.

But it seems that such sanctions are too much to ask.

In any case, I’m tired of the recklessness and lack of personal responsibility of the stars. And I’m even more tired of the weak law enforcement response. And undoubtedly, it seems like some of these already famous individuals, like Britney Spears, bask in the glow of their recklessness. If that indeed is the case as I suppose it to be, maybe the media could do us all a favor by not covering these stories and continuing to glorify the stupidity of these indigents.

Basically everyone just needs to follow that adage that seems as old as time, “Don’t Drink and Drive!”

-Maelstrom

America No You Didn't

I know the title may be a little misleading, but this is a serious issue to me! It’s not often that I give in to watching TV’s most annoying genre “Reality TV,” which is often the farthest thing from reality. However, one show has captured my attention for the last two full seasons, and part of the first. That show, “Dancing with the Stars,” just completed its latest season, and I must report that I have an incredible disdain for all those that voted for its eventual champion. In the final episode, former Dallas Cowboys’ running back Emmitt Smith beat former Saved by the Bell star Mario Lopez.

So anybody with far less than 20/20 vision could easily see that Mario Lopez is a far better dancer than Emmitt Smith. Not only is he a better dancer, but each of his performances, week by week, was nearly flawless. Yet and still the judges, who seemed determined to turn the competition into a farce by giving Smith a better score than Lopez when both danced Samba routines to the same song—even though Lopez literally gave a performance that obliterated Smith’s. So the day after the horrible ending to the season, I watched all the news shows, read all the comments, and visited all the message boards about the show. Unfortunately I read a litany of flawed arguments supporting the ultimate outcome. So let me just clearly lay out all of my counter arguments, and then I’ll be through.

To start, I suppose I’ll have to argue my points from a variety of different show definitions since there are several floating around now. I’ll start with the simplest definition: The winner of the show should be the best dancer by the end of the competition. Of course that’s not what happened here, so that argument is done.

The next argument is that the show is about taking a star that is not a dancer by trade, and turning them into a (ballroom) dancer. To justify the horrendous show results, people keep saying that Mario “already knew how to dance” and Emmitt didn’t. Now certainly it appears that Mario spends much time at the club breakin’ it down on the dance floor. However, I critically doubt that while bouncing through all the hottest Hollywood hotspots Mario Lopez was dancing the Paso Doble, the Jive, the Samba, the Mambo, the Tango or the Waltz. I don’t know why, but that’s just a crazy thought that crossed my mind when considering this argument, and clearly that reasoning doesn’t permeate the greater portion of show viewers. But who knows, maybe you can catch Mr. Lopez at “Peanuts” in L.A. Waltzing the night away. BUT, with this argument in mind, I’d like to point out that for years I’ve heard football players (mostly wide receivers and running backs…like Smith) tout dancing (mostly ballet) as a way for them to learn better balance and control while playing football. Perhaps Smith had such training? If so, wouldn’t he, not Lopez, have an unfair advantage?

One argument that I truly disdain is this notion that Mario was as good at the last episode as he was at the beginning, but Emmitt got better throughout the show. HOLD UP…did these people watch the whole season. I did, and Emmitt absolutely did NOT get appreciably better throughout the course of the show. He progressed about as much as a tortoise running the 100-meter dash. The fact of the matter is very few of the shows final participants progressed tremendously from week 1 to the end. The one exception being Monique Coleman, who should’ve been in the final with Mario in my opinion (and I admit that despite the fact that I’m totally in love with Edyta, Joey Lawrence’s partner, and loved every episode that she graced—half-naked with those long sexy legs of hers).

I also keep hearing that Mario was “cocky,” and I read that Mario “knew he had it in the bag.” NO, NO, NO!!!! Those are characteristics that we, as human beings, assign to people (often wrongly) who are confident and good at what they do. At no point during the show did I get the impression that Lopez was a cocky S-O-B. In fact, do you recall the episode where there were behavioral analyses of the show’s contestants? The finding of the behavior analyst was that Mario had the classic look of someone that was subservient when the judges were handing down their judgments. Does that sound like someone who’s cocky? And on the flipside of the coin, how many times did Emmitt Smith refer to “not wanting to lose,” and “being a champion?” Such comments by Smith saturated the final 4 episodes. Sound like someone who’s not cocky?

Smith seemed bent on winning and being the champion, which seems cocky to me. But Mario has been assigned the cocky label. Smith’s dancing didn’t markedly improve over the course of the show. But we recall that Mario looked good in both the 1^st and last episodes, so we say he didn’t get better and Emmitt did. We say that Smith won over the crowd and that’s why he won, even though almost all of Mario’s performances elicited standing ovations.

So here’s the deal, the results of the show demonstrate human nature. When someone is confident and good at something (like Lopez), we tend to call them cocky even when they aren’t. And when someone is an underdog (like Smith), we tend to root for them, often overlooking their shortcomings in the process. For example, many of the things that people now criticize Lopez for could easily be leveled at Smith. But we only remember who the underdog was, and I suppose that’s something that the majority of the population can identify with, therefore we vote accordingly.

But it wasn’t just the viewing audience that was guilty of demonstrating human nature. Even the judges were guilty…BIG TIME!!! I still can’t see how they justify giving Emmitt a perfect 30 for his Samba during the last episode, but only giving Mario a 29 when they danced the same dance to the same music. Mario was better than Emmitt by leaps and bounds. Then again the judges are only human, and that was evident in their comments. Carrie Ann Inaba, one of the three judges, once exclaimed that because she perceived Mario to be a good dancer that she was going to be more critical about his performances. HOW IS THAT FAIR???!!!!!

I really appreciated the American public when they finally voted Jerry Springer off; even if it was an episode too late (Willa Ford should not have gotten voted off before Jerry…she had mad potential). But in the finale they got it all wrong, and for all the wrong (very flawed) reasons.

I pretty much avoid Reality TV with a passion, but being the amateur dancer that I am this one has caught my eye each time. I just wish that the American public would give up on this “root for the underdog” mentality and just let the underdog fight for itself (unless you’re referring to the University of Michigan this weekend vs. the Ohio State University).

Once again America, you have disappointed me. Mario “A.C. Slater” Lopez should’ve won hands down.

America, no you didn’t!!!

-Maelstrom