Friday, November 25, 2005

The NBA Dress Code

So I guess Russell Simmons failed!

Flashback to the year 1992: Def Jam Records co-founder Russell Simmons launches the first major hip-hop clothing line, Phat Farm. Recognizing the reality that the clothing does not make the man and that there was a large demand for so-called Urban Wear, Simmons boldly went where many have since followed. His stated goal was to prove that there is room in corporate America for the garb that is often represented in a culture called “hip-hop,” and that not everyone wearing such attire is a “thug.”

It’s now a couple weeks into the 2005-06 NBA season, and if you don’t know by now, a new NBA dress code has been implemented. In accordance with the dress code, players can no longer wear large necklaces/chains/medallions on the exterior of their clothes, doo-rags/head scarves, or headphones. On the flipside of the coin, players must wear collared shirts, dress pants, and cannot wear “work boots.” These rules apply when players enter any arena, and are in effect at all times (except while they’re in their playing uniforms).

In short, I think the new dress code is heavily flawed and has been brought about because of cultural, if not racial (and incredibly foolish), stereotypes. I think that the NBA Commissioner David Stern has turned into a dictator in his attempt to clean up the image of the NBA in the post-Pistons/Pacers brawl era. And ultimately, I think this policy and his statements are so amazingly hypocritical on several levels.

I’ll begin defending my thesis by noting that Stern is taking his job too seriously. He keeps asserting that the NBA is a business, pulling in $3 Billion Dollars a year, and that its members should carry themselves (i.e. look) like businessmen. Well I have a serious problem with Stern looking at the NBA from this perspective. It is true that the NBA is a business, of sorts. It is also true that it makes a lot of money. These things I would never dispute. However Pornography, Lawn Care, and Automobile Repair are also businesses…and you know what, they dress (or don’t dress, as the case may be) in the attire that is appropriate for their job. Stern’s argument about the NBA being a business likens the NBA to Wall Street.

That is the farthest thing from reality.

The NBA is about 1 thing and 1 thing only: Entertainment. That’s right, entertainment on a similar wavelength with Hollywood. And much like Hollywood, part of the biggest appeal (you know, the part that helps make the $3 Billion in revenue) is the individuality of the players that make up the NBA. It is for certain that people are curious to see what “A.I” is going to wear in the post-game press conference. It is for sure that people find it entertaining to see Rasheed Wallace bouncing his head to the music in his headphones during a pre-game interview. The individual aspect of the game (largely what makes the game so much fun to watch), what this business truly is all about, is now being abandoned.

To piggyback on that notion, the NBA already has a dress code. When they’re on the clock, every player is wearing a jersey with their number and name on it. I’ve never seen a player playing while wearing a medallion or sporting a headscarf. And that makes sense. You see, once upon a time I worked at McDonald’s (if the NBA is a business, certainly Mickey Dee’s is), and we also had a dress code. But you know what, unless I was on the clock, working in the capacity of that business, I didn’t have to adhere to the dress code. This meant that when I exited my vehicle and entered McDonald’s, I could be dressed in mismatched shoes, a polka-dot sweater and fluorescent orange jeans. However, once I punched in, I had to have the familiar McDonald’s shirt, pants and hat on. Stern’s policy regulates the players from the moment they get into their limo, or the team airplane, until the time they leave the arena.

Isn’t that a little excessive? I think so!

Especially since it may affect the player’s performance. Anyone who works any job will attest to wanting to relax prior to work. So why are NBA players now being denied (to some extent) the same opportunity. Some NBA players listen to music to take their mind off the ensuing game. Some players, being superstitious, wear special jewelry before each game. And if you buy the argument that sports is largely psychological (and trust me athletes often think so), then it is feasible to suggests that such change in routine (which dates back to childhood for many) could have an affect on their playing.

Undoubtedly the NBA has experienced significant bad press over the course of the last few seasons. Probably the most notable occurrences are the “basketbrawl” of last season, and the fall from grace of Kobe Bryant, one of the NBA’s biggest names. However, changing the outer appearance does not change people. If players want to fight during a game, they’ll still do so, it’s been happening as far back as I can remember (and I’ve been avidly watching the NBA for nearly 20 years). Indeed, I think Allen Iverson put it best when he said, “you can put a murderer in a suit, but he’s still a murderer.”

Now back to that $3 Billion Dollars a year. Where in the world, or how in the world does the NBA think it makes that money. Well, let me tell you. The NBA capitalizes on the Hip-Hop culture that Stern and many others (primarily Phil Jackson) criticize. The NBA now uses, on a regular basis, “Throwback” Jerseys which were made popular through hip-hop. NBA exposure through hip-hop music has been present for over a decade at least. Even a handful of NBA stars have had their own hip-hop albums. In fact, arguably the NBA’s biggest star, Shaquille O’Neal, has something like (I can’t remember for sure) 4 Gold Albums and 1 Platinum Album, featuring some of Hip-Hop’s biggest stars including the late Notorious B.I.G. Some of Hip-Hop’s most successful artists, like Jay-Z and Sean Combs, now have part ownership of NBA franchises or are pursuing it.

Without a speckle of doubt, the NBA is as big as it is today specifically because of its intermingling with the hip-hop culture.

That being said, I am absolutely tired of people wearing Timberland Boots and Platinum Chain medallions being equated with gangsters and thugs. When people say that (i.e. Phil Jackson and several news reporters…even acclaimed Black film director Spike Lee) it makes me so mad I want to spit nails. For starters, when people say such things it clearly indicates to me that they are out of touch with the younger, “hip-hop” generation. The gangster era in hip-hop died, in my opinion, when Tupac was murdered (about 10 years ago). Since then we’ve gone from Jiggy to Bling-Bling to Pimp. And if you want to say that Platinum Chains and Gold encrusted Chalices are negative depictions that shouldn’t be portrayed by NBA players because it is representative of the Pimp imagery, then fine. That logic would indicate to me that the critic has a full awareness of where the music and the culture are today, and would get little rise out of me at all. However, to place all “hip-hoppers” in one basket because of their dress, and call that basket “thug” let’s me know that there are stereotypes and prejudices at play that have been engrained in the minds of hip-hop haters.

Furthermore, if hip-hop is such a bad thing, explain to me why even the gangsta era hip-hop artists have found cross-over success. Snoop Dogg is a spokesman for Chrysler and recently did a commercial with Chrysler Corporation Chairman Lee Iacocca. Ice Cube and Ice Tea have both become prominent and respectable forces in Hollywood. And that’s just to name a few. And each of those artists has dedicated time, their voices, and their skills to the NBA in some way form or fashion. And the NBA stands to gain the most from it simply because when hip-hop artists speak, the generation listens and follows.

When Snoop wears a Kobe jersey, the sales for Kobe’s jerseys goes up. When Jay-Z wears a Jason Kidd jersey, everybody rushes to the stores to see if the Kidd jersey is still in stock. And who benefits? Not Snoop, Kobe, “Hova” or Kidd…the NBA does.

And how hypocritical is it (or at least fundamentally flawed) for the NBA to solicit high school and young college talent but not allow these people to dress like their peers. Many of the leagues 30 and under players grew up in neighborhoods and areas where hip-hop was all they knew. Despite their hip-hop backgrounds, their talent is what makes them good enough to play in the NBA. But now the NBA is too good for their background???

So basically the NBA wants the talent, but not the “baggage” that goes along with it.

For arguments’ sake, I’ll buy the case that wearing Roc-a-wear sweats with a Jakob the Jeweler watch and a G-unit platinum (spinning) medallion is representative of gangsters and thugs. What does the dress code change then?

Answer: Absolutely nothing.

So now they’ve gone from dressing like Gangstas on the street to dressing like Gangstas in corporate America. Because last I checked, the biggest thugs and gangsters in this country wore suits, collared shirts, neck-ties, and worked on Wall Street. I mean, what exactly is a thug? An Enron executive? A WorldCom CEO? A Tyco Board Member? A United States President? All these people wear suits and ties and don’t dress in the attire of hip-hoppers, but they are no less criminals, thieves or crooks (i.e. thugs and gangsters) because they look the part of the stereotypical law-abiding citizen.

NBA players and those that identify with the hip-hop culture should be so offended that they boycott anything hip-hop based that benefits the NBA. The handful of hip-hop artists that still wear jerseys should cease. Players shouldn’t do anymore shoe commercials that feature hip-hop music. Players shouldn’t be in anymore commercials promoting NBA teams if the commercial features a hip-hop beat. Hip-hoppers shouldn’t buy NBA player-endorsed shoes or their clothing and then wear them in music videos. NBA players should refuse to wear throwback jerseys during home games they’re supposed to wear them in. There should be absolutely no intersection between hip-hop and the NBA, and I guarantee that the 3 Billion dollars that Stern is touting would sharply diminish. Then what would his business do?

For Stern to implement such a prejudiced policy (I haven’t even gotten into the implications for players from overseas, or those that don’t dress in hip-hop clothing, but rather in other attire that’s no-longer acceptable) means that he’s missing the point, and I don’t want to miss the point.

The point is simply this, running a business is all about making money and providing a service. By Stern squelching the individuality of the players through this superfluous dress code he is doing a strong disservice to the culture that makes this business as lucrative and commercially successful as it is. There is a direct correlation between the $3 Billion Dollars the NBA makes each year and its intermingling with the Hip-Hop Culture. Unfortunately, there is a direct correlation between what Stern thinks is wrong with the NBA and Hip-Hop as well.

I’d just like to say that he’s wrong, and that the NBA is fine. Also, the problems that do exist have more to do with certain individuals, and not the apparent “Universal Dumping Ground” culture of Hip-Hop. When he learns how to deal with people on a more personable level, the pockets of trouble around the NBA will also subside. Because all he’s doing with his dictator-like stance these days is alienating not only the players, but the fans as well.

Sounds like to me that Stern needs to brush up on Business 101!
-Maelstrom

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Be Grateful

I know I don’t need to say much to drive this point home, but I think it’s totally appropriate to amplify it.

Today is among my favorite days on the calendar. It is my favorite Holiday and (as I sometimes quip to those who know me) the 2nd most important day in November. Thanksgiving Day is the one Holiday that we have in this country that everyone can participate in. There’s no religious affiliation, no political under-current, no person-specific glorification. Thanksgiving Day is a day when everyone actually pauses and considers the things they have to be thankful for (or at least the notion of “thankfulness” is brought to the forefront). And no matter who you are, or what condition you find yourself in, there’s something to be thankful for. Especially if you’re reading this blog, because that means that you have computer access and access to the internet (not to mention access to the greatest site on the web).

In my “old” age, I have my doubts about all the stories I’ve been taught about the origin of Thanksgiving; the Pilgrims and the “Indians” getting together happily and sharing the edible elements of their culture. No matter the origins though, I’m glad that it has turned into this very positive Holiday with a reputable purpose. Unfortunately I think it is too easily and too often glossed over by the Holidays that precede and follow it. Money-grubbing businesses and corporations, along with gift-hungry children, consumed by the decadence of Halloween and the selfishly commercialized nature of Christmas promote their madness without making mention of Thanksgiving.

Thanksgiving should not be glossed over. Thanksgiving should not be about eating Turkey (though I certainly enjoy it). Thanksgiving should not be that minor thing that happens in-between Halloween and Christmas. Thanksgiving should be a day that gives you pause and causes you to consider all the many things that you have to be thankful about.

That being said, take a moment and rewind your mind to this time last year. Recall where you were at. Consider the prospects that lay before you. Now, fast forward to today and remind yourself of all the things that transpired in the last 365 days (think big picture here). Since Thanksgiving 2004 there have been several natural disasters. Many of which were unprecedented and none of us could’ve anticipated at this time last year.

The Tsunami in the Indian Ocean claimed hundreds of thousands of lives. The recent earthquake in Pakistan has claimed tens of thousands. The 2005 Atlantic Hurricane season is still taking lives well into the thousands. Tornadoes aplenty have sadly claimed their number of lives too. Several religious pilgrimages ended tragically as people were murdered at some, and stampeded at others. All-in-all, this year has been monumental with respect to natural disasters and the number of lives claimed and/or altered. And do I even need to mention the many people that have met their demise at the hands of war and fighting.


All those lives taken, all those people forever changed. And that could’ve been any one of us (as my mother often says, “but for the grace of God, there go I”). So indeed, in that very broad manner, we are blessed. But don’t forget the many things we often take for granted. Shoes on your feet, clothes on your back, a roof over your head, food on your table, money in your pocket, good health; these are all things to be thankful for. And trust me, where you live today (in your village, city or town…in your neighborhood…somewhere near you specifically…you don’t have to even think of the poor people in Africa to realize this), there are people that don’t have those things. And that is indeed something to be thankful for.

If there’s one fallacy of this wondrous holiday, it is that it lends itself to the lazy mentality. You know, it causes people to focus all their grateful energy on just this one day, then people go on living a life of selfishness and inconsiderateness. Every day you live, you have something to be thankful for. If you eat every day, you have something to be thankful for. If you have all your limbs, and all 5 senses, then you’re truly blessed.

So I suppose my “after-school-special” point of this blog is don’t just be thankful on Thanksgiving Day. Be grateful every day of your life, because no matter how impecunious your situation, you’re doing better than many, and things could certainly be worse off for you.

Happy Thanksgiving,
-Maelstrom

PS: In the last several weeks, I have learned that many more people than I thought actually read “The Vortex.” So, I am thankful that despite the (sometimes) weeks between posts, I’m able to garner a few minutes of your time. I’m certainly grateful for each and every reader and do hope that you continue to read this site.

And to Sara, who left a comment here at the end of my last post and noted that I hadn’t written her back (presumably on thefacebook), this is Maelstrom saying hello. It has indeed been a looooong time. I hope that you’re finding success in whatever it is that you’re doing, because I’m expecting great things out of you. And thank you for your many kind comments and for reading this site. I truly appreciate it. We will be in contact in the future, but for now, I hope this suffices.

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

You’re Too Old For Halloween!

New rule: Halloween is for homo sapiens 12 years old and younger ONLY!

Over the weekend I once again witnessed the pure decadence of men and women in my surroundings and decided that some things should be for kids and kids only. Halloween, a “holiday” that has interesting roots, is an occasion that eventually morphed into an opportunity for children to dress up in “spooky” costumes while makeshift panhandling for candy. But now it has taken on a new face that has me seriously questioning my generation.

You see, there should be requirements concerning “trick or treating.” You should be under 12 years old and/or shorter than 4 feet 6 inches. At the age of 4, 7, or 9, Halloween is an innocent event that affords children the opportunity to catch up on all the candy that mommy and daddy wouldn’t let them eat throughout the year.

But after 12 years old, children should be cut off. And here’s why…

…as you enter your teen years, and your hormones begin raging, and adolescence sets in, so does deviant behavior. As we get older, we pervert innocent things like Halloween. And I’ve watched the progression. Halloween goes from dressing up in “cute” little outfits to pulling pranks on people (like egging cars and “tee-peeing” houses). I’ve even heard tell of middle teens “bag-snatching” from small children during Halloween.

But the decadence doesn’t stop there.

These illicit behaviors reach full fruition in the late teens and early twenties. All weekend long I witnessed hundreds and hundreds of young adult women dressed in, well, I’ll call it “revealing” clothing (in lieu of using a couple of other terms I can think of to describe it). It’s as if the goal is to be as trashy as possible.

Now check this out, I saw droves and droves of guys dressed up as women for their costume. And I was lookin’ like, “when did this become the standard male costume?” Dresses, pumps, wigs, jewelry, make-up carefully done, complete with boobs and bras. I mean, the guys really had the stereotypical female look down to a tee. They looked more like ladies than the women did.

I find it funny that the women are dressed in attire that is presumably supposed to be attractive to guys, while the guys are busy trying to become what women used to be.

Anyhow, all I’m trying to say is that the bawdry nature of Halloween today could be easily rectified if 13-year-olds (and above) were banned from participating.

If I should ever participate in handing out candy from my doorstep one day, I will be certain to take “roll call” before anyone gets a Snickers from me. And I don’t care if they’re dressed up like Jesus, if they’re 13 or older I’m going to slap them, and tell them to go home, and never participate again. Hopefully this will serve as a future deterrent, and spare Halloween from the debauchery that it has now become.

-Maelstrom

The Sidebar
So, like I figured, Bush nominated a new candidate for the Supreme Court before much of the country was even awake Monday. And I just have to hand it to the guys he’s got working for him; they push their corruption to the side and manage to frame everything in such a way that it’s a win-win for Bush.

I just wish that everyone would pay attention and see how often the administration champions an idea, and then jumps to the other side of the coin when the initial idea doesn’t work for them.

When Harriet Miers was first nominated, Bush glorified the fact that she didn’t have a tainted judicial past, and that she came from the second best law school in Texas as opposed to the typical Ivy League elite. Those notions were shot down by the Right, so then Bush nominates this guy Alito. Now he’s praising Alito’s 15 years on the bench (saying he has more judicial experience than any nominee in 70 years), and of course Alito comes from Stanford.

Not only does Bush do this back and forth dance, so does his party.

When John Roberts was going through the confirmation process, he essentially said “hi, I’m John Roberts, and I won’t answer any questions.” He certainly wouldn’t give his thoughts or opinions on Roe v. Wade. That decision, to essentially plead the 5th, by Roberts was praised by the Right. They said his nomination isn’t about one single issue and he shouldn’t have to answer such questions. However, when Miers was on the block, they wanted to hear her say that she would vote against Roe v. Wade. She didn’t, but to prove that she would, her minister spoke to members of the administration that tried to assure the Right that she’s “one of us,” touting her Evangelical Christian conversion (a distinction that has come to mean if you are in favor of abortion, you’re going to go to Hell 6 times and maybe a 7th for good measure).

So on this 1st Tuesday in November, I’m reminded of an election that took place 365 days ago; a time when the term “flip-flop” meant the certain loss of any chance at Presidency for Mr. John Kerry. With that in mind, I have to ask, if flip-flopping was bad for the country in the case of John Kerry (1 of 100 Senators), isn’t it even worse for the country if the person (and the party) running it is also doing the same thing?